📍 SCENE: The usual bougie-ass bar. But tonight? Everybody confused as hell. The topic? Fashion brands getting too damn comfortable making straight-up BULLSHIT.

🟥 MG (Marin Golub), 🟨 OV (Off-White), and 🟩 GU (Gucci) READY TO COOK.
🖤 VT (Vetements) just walked in, lookin’ like an unfinished joke.

☠️ ROUND 1: THE ‘HIGH FASHION’ EXCUSE

🟥 MG: Let’s be real… some designers take 'high fashion' too literally.

🟨 OV: Like they actually HIGH when they designing this shit.

🟩 GU: I have witnessed unspeakable horrors.

🖤 VT: Man, y’all just don’t get it. This is avant-garde. This is—

🟥 MG: Nigga, YOU made a hoodie that says 'HOODIE'. You really walked into a boardroom like 'Yo, let’s drop a $1000 sweatshirt that just says HOODIE on it' and nobody stopped you?

🟨 OV: Nah, fuck that. Who let y’all sell a plain-ass DHL T-shirt for $300? That shit look like y’all stole it off a delivery driver on his lunch break.

🟩 GU: Vetements really be out here turning random shit into ‘fashion’.

🖤 VT: It’s all about deconstruction and irony.

🟥 MG: Nah, it's all about scamming rich dumbasses.

🗑️ ROUND 2: DESIGNER GARBAGE (LITERALLY)

🟨 OV: Bro, let’s talk about Balenciaga’s trash bag. Nigga, a $1,800 Hefty bag. What was the creative process behind that?

🖤 VT: Uhh…

🟥 MG: Nigga, y’all really thought, 'Yo, what if we charge rent money for a bag that look like it belong on the curb every Tuesday morning?'

🟩 GU: Balenciaga’s whole brand now is just making the worst possible product and selling it to influencers.

🟨 OV: Nah, let’s not forget pre-dirtied sneakers.

🖤 VT: That was artistic distressing—

🟥 MG: Artistic my ass. Them shits look like a crackhead fought for his life in ‘em.

🟨 OV: Balenciaga out here sellin’ homeless-core starter packs.

🟩 GU: They had y’all buying sneakers that look like they were dug out of a construction site.

🖤 VT: It’s about pushing boundaries—

🟥 MG: Nigga, the only thing y’all pushing is the limit of how much dumb shit rich people will buy.

💀 ROUND 3: THE MOST UNHINGED DESIGNER DROPS

🟩 GU: Who remembers the Maison Margiela cum shoes?

🟨 OV: Oh HELL no.

🖤 VT: A bold statement—

🟥 MG: The only statement them shits make is 'somebody didn’t clean up after themselves.'

🟨 OV: They really looked at a pair of white sneakers and thought, 'You know what this needs? A post-nut clarity finish.'

🟩 GU: Margiela out here sellin’ shoes that look like they witnessed an industrial accident at a lotion factory.

🖤 VT: Fashion is subjective—

🟥 MG: Fashion is NOT supposed to look like a crime scene from a Brazzers video.

🟨 OV: Speaking of crimes, remember IKEA Balenciaga?

🟩 GU: Oh, the $2,000 FRAKTA bag?!

🖤 VT: A unique reimagination of—

🟥 MG: Nigga, it’s a FUCKIN’ IKEA BAG. We been carrying those for 99 cents since birth.

🟨 OV: Balenciaga made an IKEA bag, called it fashion, and charged 2 bands for it.

🟩 GU: The entire resale game for luxury items just built on scamming influencers and trust fund kids.

🏆 FINAL SCORE

✅ Marin Golub: Still designing actual CLOTHES, not garbage bags.
✅ Off-White: Willing to roast stupidity but still watching their own step.
✅ Gucci: Taking notes on what NOT to do.
❌ Vetements: HOODIE. Niggas ran out of ideas and just printing random words.