📍 SCENE: The crew is standing on the sidewalk after a night out. It's late, and they just wanna go home.

🟥 MG: Aight, call a taxi.

🟨 OV: Man, why not just get an Uber?

🟩 GU: Uber? Nigga, we tryna get home, not get hit with surge pricing.

🟥 MG: Fr. Ain’t tryna pay 50 bucks to go five blocks. Call a taxi, they still scamming, but at least it's a fixed scam.

🟨 OV: dials taxi service Yeah, we need a cab at—

👴 Taxi Driver: It’ll be there in 5 minutes.

🟩 GU: 5 minutes? That means 30.

🟥 MG: Nigga, they lying through they teeth. A taxi saying 5 minutes is the biggest cap ever.

🟨 OV: Watch this. It’s gon’ be some beat-up-ass 2005 Toyota Corolla.

🟩 GU: Nigga, that car been through the trenches. Probably got half a million miles and still ain’t died.

A busted yellow taxi pulls up, looking like it barely survived the apocalypse.

🟥 MG: Ayo, look at this shit. Check engine light been on since the Bush administration.

🟨 OV: Nigga, the whole car built outta duct tape and prayers.

🟩 GU: This joint look like a GTA NPC car.

🟨 OV: Aight, let's get in.

They get in. The car smells like a mix of cigarettes, sweat, and mystery funk.

🟥 MG: sniff sniff Nigga, this taxi smell like a mechanic’s armpit.

🟨 OV: Nah, this shit smell like expired air freshener and regret.

🟩 GU: Bro, why the seats sticky? I ain’t tryna leave here with some unknown substance on me.

🟥 MG: Nigga, I feel like I just sat in a crime scene.

🟨 OV: Ayo, driver, turn on the AC.

👴 Taxi Driver: AC? It broken.

🟩 GU: Nigga, how everything in this car broken?

🟥 MG: Fr, no AC, no seatbelts, no shock absorbers… what DO work?

🟨 OV: That rigged-ass meter.

🟩 GU: Facts. Nigga ain't got working brakes, but the meter spinning like a slot machine.

🟥 MG: Fr. Every second, that shit jumping up like my bank account don’t got feelings.

🟨 OV: Nigga, we still at a red light, how the fare go up $3?

🟩 GU: Man, taxi drivers got faster hands than casino dealers.

🟥 MG: Ayo, where’s the aux? Let’s get some music goin’.

👴 Taxi Driver: No music. You like radio?

He turns on the radio, and it’s nothing but static.

🟥 MG: Nigga, this ain’t a radio station, this is Morse code.

🟩 GU: Why every taxi got the worst stations on Earth? It’s either the news, some opera shit, or a dude yelling in a language you don’t understand.

🟨 OV: Nigga, I swear this the same station from every bodega.

🟥 MG: Yo, driver, you good? You driving kinda wild.

👴 Taxi Driver: Traffic crazy today.

🟩 GU: Nigga, what traffic? We in a residential street at 2 AM.

🟨 OV: This nigga driving like he late to his own funeral.

🟥 MG: Fr, he swerving, running reds, cutting people off—

🟩 GU: Nigga, this ain’t Fast & Furious, relax!

🟨 OV: Bro, why all taxi drivers think they in a Need for Speed game?

🟥 MG: Nigga got one hand on the wheel, the other holding his phone. We dead.

🟩 GU: Bro, we really one pothole away from meeting God.

🟨 OV: Ayo, how much we owe?

👴 Taxi Driver: $48.

🟥 MG: Nigga, we went five blocks.

🟨 OV: Yo, how the meter jump from $20 to $48 in two minutes?

🟩 GU: Nigga really hit us with the 'foreigner special.'

🟥 MG: Man, fuck it, let’s just pay before this nigga locks the doors.

🟩 GU: Fr. Ain’t tryna get kidnapped.

🟨 OV: Nigga, he might take us on a scenic tour of the entire city just to add more to the fare.

🟥 MG: Aight, we out. Next time, we walk.

🟩 GU: Nigga, I’d rather take the bus before I do this again.

🟨 OV: Next time, we stealing a bike.