📍 SCENE: The crew is chilling when OV gets a text.

🟨 OV: Ayo, why this nigga textin’ me with a green bubble?

🟥 MG: looks at the phone Oh nah, that’s a felony.

🟩 GU: Y’all iPhone niggas act like green bubbles lower your credit score.

🟨 OV: Nigga, they do. I ain’t trusting no nigga texting me from an Android. You might as well be hittin’ me up from a payphone.

🟥 MG: Nigga, why yo messages look like a scam? Every time a green bubble pops up, I start lookin’ over my shoulder like I’m about to get hacked.

🟩 GU: Man, Android does everything better. Customization, battery life, better cameras—

🟨 OV: Nigga, your camera look like it got recorded on a Nintendo DS.

🟥 MG: Nah, for real, why every Android video look like it got filmed in 2004? Nigga be at a concert, recordin’ with a 4K 120 FPS Ultra HDR 10-bit camera, and that shit still come out lookin’ like it was shot on a potato.

🟩 GU: But y’all niggas literally pay $1,200 for the same phone every year.

🟨 OV: Yeah, but at least our shit work. Nigga, why y’all got 20GB of RAM and yo phone still lagging?

🟥 MG: Android got all the power, but still be moving slow as hell. That’s like having a Lamborghini that takes 10 seconds to start.

🟩 GU: Yeah? At least I can download music straight to my phone. Y’all still gotta pay for Apple Music or be on some broke nigga SoundCloud ads shit.

🟨 OV: Nigga, why y’all got 14 different app stores? I can’t trust a phone that lets me download a virus straight from Google.

🟥 MG: Nah, fr. Niggas be installing a flashlight app and get their bank account drained.

🟩 GU: At least I ain’t got no charging anxiety. Y’all niggas gotta be near a wall 24/7 like y’all serving a prison sentence.

🟨 OV: Nigga, you still using a wire. We been on MagSafe, meanwhile you out here lookin’ for a USB-C cable like it’s a lost dog.

🟥 MG: Nah, fr. Android niggas always carrying a 12-foot-long charging cable like they about to go rock climbing.

🟩 GU: Y’all niggas got the same ugly-ass emoji pack since 2011. Shit look like clip art.

🟨 OV: At least we got emoji reactions! Nigga, you still out here getting ‘Laughed at [message]’ texts like you on a flip phone.

🟩 GU: But guess what? I can send files over Bluetooth.

🟥 MG: Nigga, who the fuck sending files over Bluetooth in 2025? What, you tryna airdrop me a MP3 ringtone?

🟨 OV: Nah, this nigga sending .apk files like he in 2012.

🟩 GU: Man, Android niggas just tryna live. Y’all be treating us like we unvaccinated.

🟥 MG: Nah, for real, a green bubble pop up, and niggas start whispering. It’s like showing up to a Gucci store wearing Walmart slides.

🟨 OV: smirks You ever notice when a nigga switch from Android to iPhone, they never go back?

🟩 GU: silent for a moment ...Man, shut the fuck up.